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Must Read: My Celebrity Girlfriend – Season 1 Episode 11 – Stories


The memories kept hurting her. She needs to do something fast to cool down her head. Maybe a drink or two would do the trick.

She changed into a simple gown and went downstairs. She saw her little sister miracle crying but she neglected her.

Her dad was still cursing her under his breath.

She just passed him and went to where her car is parked.

She entered her car and found out that the fuel tank is still empty.

Stephanie: *shouting* Fool, i thought i said you should buy me fuel…

The guard came close but not too close.

Guard: sorry ma. The filling station across the street doesn’t have fuel.

Stephanie: is that the only filling station in this state. Are you trying to tell me that there is no other filling station in this state.

Guard: *silent*
stephanie: haa.. You are such a fool, an idiotic fellow. You know what, come close and give me my money.
Guard didn’t move.
Stephanie: ah ah. You don’t want to give me my money again?
Guard: *stretches his hand* here take it..
Stephanie: don’t you dare disobey me.. Come close and give me my d–n f—–g money.

Guard came closer. She collected the money and
*Gboooaaaa*
Stephanie: that will put a little sense in that big coconut you are calling head. Mtcheeew!!!
She said and walked out to take a cab while the guard was holding his face…
.
.
.
2 years later

I was in my room with Samuel drinking garri and kuli kuli. My body was now fine and i could walk properly.

About the Job, i didn’t get it. I know that other people with higher connection who was not qualified for the job was given the job.

Me: *taking 2 spoons per minute* chaii Samuel, this garri dey slap oo..
Samuel: *taking 3 spoons per minute* na so i like am but the kuli kuli to strong.
Me: *taking 4 spoons per minute* yes na true. Maybe next time na hajiya place we go buy.
Samuel: haba small small na, na fight?
Me: na me you dey ask, when you dey take one spoon ahead of me you been no think say na fight.
Samuel: wait oo, na me you dey talk to like that?
Me: *forgetting that he bought the garri and kuli kuli with his money* na your papa i dey talk to like dat idiot.

Samuel just jejely stood up with the garri and kuli kuli.
Me: haba na where you dey go?
Samuel: ask me again!
Me: no be so na, where you dey carry lunch dey go?
Samuel: i dey carry am go your father backiyard idiot. Come chop make i see.
Me: no be so na, na fight we dey fight?
Samuel: no be fight na… We dey joke as usuall.
Me: then bring lunch come make we eat na…
Samuel: if i give you, make amadioha make me lay eggs.

Just then we heard a voice from the radio
voice: my people my people. We don come to talk the winning numbers of baba ijebu. This week number na 35247, happy enjoyment to the winners.

Me and Samuel: Eeeeeeehhhh JESUS!!!!!!

We shouted and the compound shook to its foundation, we just won, we just won. With the speed of light, we hugged ourselves crying very hard. Tears of joy.
Samuel: take the garri and the kuli kuli. Eat all i dash you…
Me: *grabbed the bowl and prayed he started laying eggs* oboi make we go collect our money sharp.

Samuel: wait first make we go baff out poverty from our body, spray perform and welcome riches.
Me: True talk. Oya go baff quickly!! 

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Posted by December 26, 2016.

Categories: Stories

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